Thursday, December 17, 2009

What's With All These Changes Anyway

I have a hard time remembering to cough into my  elbow.  I just can't get it

I've had a cough since the swine flu struck a month ago and when the urge hits, I first go for my hands, because I have a big gob of Kleenex there, then I remember the elbow drill, go for that, remember the gunk that flies, lunge for the Kleenex again, elbow, spew, charge for the door, redden in the face, horrify others, make the sign for "Make way for one who is unclean", and pass out before having to make eye contact with anyone.  All the while I'm holding back a cough.

Five-year-olds make it look so automatic.  I can't do it.  It just doesn't work.  Maybe it's because my arms are just too long.  I'm afraid of clubbing my neighbor.  Maybe it's because of all the gesturing that takes place.  Maybe it's because I end up feeling like a big bag of germs coughing into my clothes like that.  I don't know.  I just liked coughing into my hands.  It's discreet, handy and quite lady-like.  Coughing into your elbow indeed.

I'm smart enough to not want to shake hands with someone holding a big handful of used Kleenex.  Why isn't everyone else?  I'm really not that bright.

1 comment:

Sandi said...

LOL, I agree! My kids came home and told me that I'd been teaching them wrong this whole time. They're NOT supposed to cover their mouths with their hands...they're supposed to use their elbows. I just rolled my eyes and said, well, at least your mouth would be covered either way! They keep reminding me that I "do it wrong" though. Bless their hearts. The reason they make it look so simple is cuz they have been taught from day ONE in school...that and they have short, stubby arms!